...Thats for sure... That could just be the end of my post right there, but I suppose I will elaborate...
Ever since I lost Cara I have noticed my "friend" chain change a bit. I have had some tell me that "I need to get over it." Some compared her death to the death of their grandparents. I was even told that all the new found friends I had made through support groups did nothing but bring me down.
On the left is Ashley. friends for 17 years and Kalyn on the right friends for 22 years.
Now on the other hand I do have friends who constantly remember her and ask about her. That of course makes me feel fantastic. Nonetheless friendships are still different. I am a friend with baggage now. I have a dead daughter and a lot of my life is consumed by happiness as well as crushing sadness. For some it is hard to understand, and I apologize if you simply can't.
Now friends tend to change regardless if you have had a loss or gone through a life altering event, that I understand. HOWEVER friends...real true friends will always be there and love you for you...no matter what you become.
Friends are slim pickings these days and I am totally fine with that. I am fabulous with or without a ton of friends.
I will leave you with a picture of my BFF since I was 10...she was my Maid of Honor and our parents are BFF's as well they just went to Hawaii together (jealous) We have been through middle school and highschool and college, and still friends. We always pick up where we left off. When I lost Cara she was willing to fly down here to just be with me. Thats amazing! Those are things I never forget.
9 comments:
What a beautiful post about two very special friends!
Thanks for sharing!
You're right. True friends will ALWAYS be there.
Heck, my baby lived, but since I've had him, my friends list has all but become non-existent.
I have a few true friends who stuck around. Like yours, they've been there since we were young.
Thank goodness for the ones who stuck around. :)
When the loss of a baby happens, you really do find out who you can have in your life and who you simply no longer can be around, it is great that you have a friend like that!
How true this is!! Im glad you still have a few amazing friends who will stick through everything with you!! Your an amazing person who wouldnt want to be your friend?
I loved your post so much today that I just had to comment! Everything that you said rang so true. I loved (and really hated) that after my daughter passed I found out what true best friend I had and the ones that had not been all along and I had never known.
Hope that ya'll have a great weekend!
xoxox
SO true! I totally know what you mean! Loosing a baby really changes you, your friendships, etc!
One person really stood out in my "saga"!
My best friend since I was 4...she took a boat from where she lives (on an island) to where I was hospitalized in NYC just a few hours after she heard the news! And she has been there every step of the way, with cards, texts, calls, visits, etc! Who needs tons of friends when you have a few really good ones!!
hold on to those true friends and also hold on to your blogger friends who understand what you are and have gone thru!!
(sorry for long post! ;-) )
You are so right. Only a few stuck around after we lost Josey and even fewer after we found out about DH's cancer. However, I am very, very thankful and grateful for those that stood by us through all of it, even when I know it made them uncomfortable.
You're so lucky to have not one but two great friends. And they are also lucky to have you. It's sad but unfortunately true. I'm sure they appreciated your post today.
I LOVE this post!!! So VERY true. It sure doesn't matter what one has been through ... your "REAL" friends will be there regardless. I just went through analyzing my friends last week. I agree with you that regardless of if I have 1 or 100 friends it doesn't matter .... it is quality not quantity!!
Love that you have these 2 amazing friends who have been there for you & with you for as long as they have been!!!
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