Question 1.

I just wanted to ask about how you were planning to cope with any anxiety that you might have about this pregnancy?

I am hoping to TTC at the end of this year but am so super worried about it (I lost my little girl, Florence at 25 weeks and nearly lost my own life too due to horrible HELLP) that I just don't know how I will cope if and when I'm pregnant again so any suggestions would be most helpful. 

The easiest thing for me is taking it one day at a time. Today im pregnant and I do not have PE or HELLP. Today is a good day. Its hard to say until you get further along how one will handle anxiety. In the beginning yes there is that fear of miscarrage, but I always just remind myself, whatever happens will happen and unfortunately there is nothing I can do about it. Other than that big worry the beginning is quite uneventful. 

As a fellow PE survivor you know what it can do to your body mind and soul. As for anxiety, after I lost Cara I spent the next three weeks at home (one of which was in the hospital)  wondering if I was going to die from a stroke. This time around I know I have doctors who take my seriously, and I will be watched very closely. Close monitoring is key. Catching things before they progress is what we will be hoping to do. That way I do not get as sick as I was with Cara. 

I will say this the Preeclampsia Forums has been and is a lifesaver to me. Those women understand. While many people sit back and think you are overreacting or will be fine this pregnancy, its nice to have people who truly understand what you have been through. For me if I did not TTC again the mere though of "what if I would have had a healthy pregnancy" would have haunted me. I did not want to give up with Cara. I wanted more. I wanted a pregnancy where doctors listened to me and my concerns.

Lastly, Zoloft. :)