I recently found out about a little boy that passed away on the day that Carter was born. (So really not so recent...but this has been on my mind) His name was Mason and he was 4 months old. He died in his sleep, cause really unknown. Now this hit me hard. Harder than I would have imagined. You would think I am used to loss by now, as I surround myself with lots of loving BLM's...and that's all we know ...but this is different.
Now that I have a son, a living child, I could never in 2974 million years imagine losing him. Cara was never alive in the outside world. Yes it is horrible and a loss is a loss either way, but losing a child that has smiled at you, cried for you and is living is just different. On another note, maybe it's not, I dont know. I can't imagine what Mason's mother had to go through. It haunts me. I know how painful losing a child that was never alive was, so I can't imagine. I just can't, there are simply no words what so ever. I do not personally know her, but I sent her a card in the mail. It was the least I could do to reach out to her.
This is such a cruel world. He was such a beautiful baby boy. I wish no one would have to suffer from loss, of any sort.
- *Laura Angel
- Illinois, United States
- I'm a mother to a beautiful angel in heaven, as well as our Earth baby Carter. My life has been filled with nothing but happiness and laughter, however I also know ultimate sadness. I continue to try to live my life to the fullest, and enjoy making people laugh along the way. You never know when your life will change forever. Mine changed November 16, 2009, when we learned our daughters heart was no longer beating. Cara was born November 17th 2009. She was 2 lbs 11oz 16 in. Preeclampsia and HELLP syndrome took her from us. I now strive to help promote Preeclampsia and HELLP Syndrome awareness. I also strive to help others who have lost a child. Its something no one can prepare you for, Its something that will forever be with you. We are happy to announce that our son Carter Allen was born March 5 2011 at 36 weeks 4 days weighing 7lbs 7oz. Carter brings such happiness and hope to our lives.
- TTC- Try to conceive
- L&D- Labor & Delivery
- BP- Blood Pressure
- Rainbow- a baby after a loss
- MFM- Maternal Fetal Medicine
- PE- Preeclampsia
- BLM- Baby Loss Mommy
5 comments:
I often thought the same way. Losing a baby is tough enough but losing a child that you've watched grow and smile and hug and all of the other wonderful things they do everyday must be much more difficult to get through. I know I wouldn't survive losing my daughter.
Breaks my heart. :(
Oh Laura, that just breaks my heart! I know what you mean. I did the same, sent out a card to Ashleys sister in law with a litle gift card in it of some sorts. But, as I am the mama of loss too, I just stood there browsing, there is NOTHING to give or write or say to another mother really that is in our shoes besides "I am so sorry". I was afraid to write in the card. BUT, I KNEW I had to send something, just sending a note that we care and have them on our minds you know?
So sweet of you. I couldn't imagine either. Yet, I can. Yet I CANT. ugh. I think so much about it, yet I am proof that I am a survivor of it, as all of us blm's are, but I just see myself screaming in agnozining pain and god knows doing what if i Lost my little Sadie. I just cant picture it and nor do I want to. I think about it, alot, too much infact. When I look at her, I just cant imagine never seeing her smiley face ever again. Lord, It would KILL me. :(
this world is so cruel. I am so sorry for this dear family. xoxox
It never gets easier....it just doesn't. And every loss we hear hits us again and makes us remember what we have lost and will never have again. Yet, our words bring hope for others. I'm sure it meant so much to her to see a card from someone who just "gets it". Your loss is a loss of a child. Something that isn't the "norm." You are a doll...and so supportive of so many. Thank you for your kind words to me and others. ((hugs))
That is so incredibly sad. I agree that a loss is a loss, but I could not imagine losing one of my kids after having them in my life. I think I would definitely go crazy. My heart goes out to all people who have had to suffer a loss in any way!! You are so sweet for sending a card.
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