I wanted more than anything for this pregnancy to be normal. I just wanted to be a normal happy pregnant women. Well that just happened to not be in my cards the past 7 weeks. I am having good days now with how I am feeling. There are still however bad days filled with nausea, tiredness, headache. I am so thrilled to be pregnant and overcome with joy, I just am counting down the days until I can REALLY enjoy this pregnancy. Its frustrating to feel fine one day and then totally out of commission the next. I told myself I would work out this pregnancy...thats a no go. I already canceled my gym membership after 5 weeks of being MIA. Do I think working out helps ward off Preeclampsia. NO. I was a runner, had a personal trainer and did yoga with Cara. So I dont think it prevents it however It is disappointing that it is just not in my cards this time. Hopefully around 15 weeks I will start to feel better and maybe be able to go on some walks with my newly trained Gia (We sent her off too a 3 week Bootcamp where she is said to come back a whole new dog)
Pregnancy after loss is harder than I thought it would be. I am dealing well, no bouts of anxiety, or freak out moments yet. However when I have a headache, or feel sick I get nervous. Thats how my pregnancy was the first time and look what ended up happening. So I can;t help but try to want to catch ANYTHING before it happens. I even called my OB and MFM to see if I can get in today instead of tomorrow. No luck. I think I am going to ask for a iron test to check my levels because of how headache-y and tired I have been. I can't help that when Im feeling off, wondering if the baby is ok. I want to do EVERYTHING in my power this time to listen to my body and help this baby be as healthy as he or she can be.
I know that I "think" its hard now...but it will be even harder when I approach the 26 week mark and 30 week mark when I lost Cara. I simply can't imagine how I will respond to a slow down of movement. Ugh, stressful to even think about. I will update after my doctor appointment tomorrow. I can't wait to hear my peanut's heartbeat!
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
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8 comments:
I am sorry that you are having feel these things and I wish you were able to enjoy your pregnancy. I think you are doing all you can as far as listening to your body and going with that. Been thinking about you and will continue to keep you in my thoughts throughout. I can only imagine how I would feel being pregnant since having lost Lilly, so many *hugs* to you.
It is a hard journey!! Keeping you in my thoughts. Your doing a great job
I'm glad you get to hear your little one's heartbeat tomorrow. That will be amazing. I hope that you start to feel better too. I had a miscarriage 2.5 months after losing Jacob, but I didn't know I was pregnant until it happened. I am scared of how nervous I will be with my next pregnancy. You seem to be handling the fear so well!
I know how you feel. I had a breakdown moment the other day when dave came home with road rash from laying down his bike going 30 mph. My bp was high that day. Everyone keeps telling me to think positive but I can't help but not think that way after what I went through. I try not to take any words to heart from people who have not been through what we have. I pray for all of us to have a happy & Healthy uneventful pregnancy. As for you being tired I would def ask about iron levels my docs have me on extra iron since after my c section last year and this pregnancy I'm not as tired I actually haven't really had to take any naps. Good luck at your appointment i can't wait for the update.
I hope you feel better soon. My nausea is starting to lift with certain things still bothering my tummy. I am thoroughly exhausted though!
My Best bud said it best, she said " after conception, there really isn't anything you can do, aside from take care of your body"...and that is soooo true. Every time I feel anxious, or start to worry about what "might happen"...I have to remind myself to live in the moment.
I hope all goes well for you tomorrow.
Pregnancy after a loss is REALLY REALLY hard. There will always be some feeling of a dark cloud just looming on the distance. Just try and enjoy as much as you can. Week by week and day by day.
By the way, I hear hormone headaches are very common.
I hear you on it being harder having to learn how to handle the roller coaster of emotions that come after experiencing a loss. Like I have mentioned many of times, my loss was completely different then yours, and I STILL struggle with finding a balance. I think it is wonderful that you are listening to your body & that you are trying to be more aware. The whole not being able to workout is a tough one I know first hand. I was very active & in the gym everyday before this pregnancy but I was not allowed to for the 1st 6 months. Then I was all ready to go back to the gym and because of different issues I have had they won't let me. That was my stress reliever, so now I have had to do other things to occupy my mind! Looking forward t hearing how your doctor visit goes! XxOo
I have not yet attempted to get pregnant again after losing Kyle. I just wanted to say my heart goes out to you. {{HUGS}}
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